As Michaels disease progressed at home I got a phone call at work ( Iwas working Partime ) that Michael it not doing well at home and its getting hard for everyone to handle now. Michaels Older brother had to take me down to living room and we had to make this next decision as the tears are flowing down my face we made the decision that its time for Michael to go to the Hospice were they could give him the care and the family could just be there enjoy is company and his funny things he was doing. The next day was the time the ambulance would come and get him I would travel with him to the Hospice. I kept telling him he’s going to place that will take good care of him I will be by your side everyday. They get him all comfortable I unpack our things because I get to stay there with him. They have routine I would help him eat his meals and we would sit and watch movies our Favs One was Frasier this would always make us laugh together if we were having crappy days and we had bought the whole series and then I would switch to Star Trek another of My loves fav. First few days were good he would sleep through the night and not see things that would startle him and scare him at night. The nurses would check on us.They are so good to him we had lots of visitors and even the band came and played for him in the solarium. Michael laid in his bed with his hands moving to the music and he would have the face expression someone made a mistake. By This time Michael couldn’t speak .I asked him one more time “do you still love me” He said back to me “Of Course” that would be the last time he spoke any words .
This part was so hard for me plus it was the best for me. They had this reclining chair and every day this is were I wouldmake my bed and be next to him, I only left to work and then come back. I would lay beside him and just look at him at night and ask. Why is this happening to you? ( I never thought I would ever get to date Michael I thought he was out of my league. Little alone be his wife which is something I cherish everyday) How did i get so lucky to have someone that loved me for me and all my quirks and things’ would think about all out conversations, the one we had driving from home and to the gig we had sometimes some very heated discussions and also very great conversations. On the way home we would talk about every thing under the sun just crazy things. The one that sticks’ in my head now is this We are in the car just before he quit driving and He said to Me ” Babe I’m older than you if something happens to me I want you to go and live life and you have a great heart”. I turned my head to the window and started to cry with tears rolling down my face I looked at him and told him “They will be no one like you you have taught me so much in my life and you taught me not to take shit” Then i come back to the reality that I’m totally losing my best friend.my soulmate My love forever. I had tears in my eyes every night so he would not hear me I would snuggle so close to him and Tell “I will always love you and take care of you I’m here Michael I’m her I wont leave and I love forever and ever” That I just love you “
The love of my life and my Soulmate and best friend
Grieving Your Soul Mate 